So, here’s the deal. While I eat disgustingly healthy most of the time, I have a secret and passionate love of making things that are so terrible for you your heart stops just thinking of them, and serving them to people other than myself. Is that wrong? It’s kind of wrong, isn’t it? Oh my yes, that’s really wrong. Devious, even. There’s a line in one of the Kill Bill movies that goes something like “this is me at my most masochistic”…Oh well.
I may not always necessarily eat them, but something about mixing decadent ingredients, with lots of fat, and lots of sugar, and lots of CHOCOLATE is just downright and deliciously bad behavior. Thus, I share a recipe I came across on Foodgawker with you.
My test subject is my all-too-willing boyfriend, who just so happens to be coming home for a visit tomorrow! Hopefully he can take them back and share them with his co-workers at the *Gros Morne Theatre Festival* (hehe – a little shameless promotion there!)
I’ve tried this recipe before – and let me tell you – the smell of it ALONE is enough to stop the ol’ ticker. Enjoy it – if you dare… MUAA HAHAHA MUAA AHAHHAHH ha h.. <ahem>
(k – before I start – *Click here for the original recipe, and way better pictures! – Caffeinated Triple Bypass Brownies by Laura Flowers*)
Caffeinated Triple Bypass Brownies
By Laura Flowers
- 1 pkg Ghirardhelli Brownie Mix, made as it says on the package
- 1 pkg Semisweet Chocolate chips
- 1 bag Kraft caramels (or whatever you can find – i got mind at bulk barn)
- 1 cup pretzels (i used pretzel sticks, smashed up)
- 1 cup chopped peanuts
- 1 tsp shortening (i used butter)
- 1/4 cup half n half cream
- 1 1/2 tsp. very finely ground Coffee
(I don’t actually have foil or the right kind of pan, lol, so I just spray a casserole dish with Pam and it seems to do the trick! Also, I used half caramels, and half chocolate caramels, just for fun.)
First, make the brownies as it states on the package, with the coffee (WHICH I FORGOT! SONOFA… Ok the coffee is going in to the melted chocolate step.. oops). (in this case, mix 1/3 cup water, 1/3 cup veggie oil, 1 egg, and 1 bag of mix together, pour out in to your pan, and bake for around 45 minutes on 325 degree heat)
Secondly, enjoy the smell. OH MY GOD these smell good already. SERIOUSLY. IT’S NOT RIGHT. Go practice guitar for your upcoming tour in these 45 minutes. Take out the brownies once a knife poked in to them comes out clean, and let them cool.
Now, spend an irritating and slogging amount of time unwrapping each caramel piece by piece until you want to claw your own eyes out. Yup. Another one.. another one.. another one.. OUCH i poked myself with my own nail. i take the eye thing back.. another one…
Melt these with 1/4 cup of half and half in the microwave, 30 seconds at a time, stirring until it’s all nice and melty. Yums.
Next up, mix together your butter and chocolate chips (and in my case the coffee – VERY VERY finely ground – i suggest using a coffee grinder – Sincerely, Captain Obvious.) and melt those in the microwave. Once that’s all nice and gooey, stir in your peanuts and pretzels, and pour that on top of all the goodness.
Let it set.
Die a little inside.
Don’t make your bed. Don’t fold the laundry.
Do not pass go – do not collect 200 dollars.
(ps. I don’t have a good picture of the finished product, because frankly, I’m no photographer, it’s really really hard to take a good picture of a gooey chocolate brownie!!!!! give it a try and see for yourself ;)